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Well, if you don’t want me to talk about furry stuff, that leaves us with… looks at notes: depression, anxiety oh no self-doubt, regret oh no no no insecurities, broken dreams, loneliness, a million abandoned hobbies soo… have you ever played any Mario games?
Art by Artmanhadrawing, source unavailable.
Seriously though, it sounds like things are really, really bad for you right now. I hope that even as the world is literally and metaphorically on fire things are able to get better for you.